Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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