Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize