So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
