Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize