quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
It was a blind-side dick pic.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize
