dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
