Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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