Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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