At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I don't think brook has ever known best
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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