Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I love how my cats smell like pot.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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