i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
