just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
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