I looked at my own cervix.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Randomize
