Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Randomize