The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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