I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
