Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
