it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
