its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize