She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
