singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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