I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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