Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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