how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Randomize
