come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
