she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
