How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
