Banned from zoo.
Again?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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