At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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