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so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize