Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
they're like a gay fantastic four
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
i out mim tonsoeep
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
