My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
