absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
