It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize
