i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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