just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize
