no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
