So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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