I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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