break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
i black out too much to be "responsible"
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
