I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize