you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
