I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize
