quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
