Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize