I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
