would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Randomize
