He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
