There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Randomize