hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
