I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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